One of the greatest advantages a child can have, is to be born into a loving two parent middle class household with strong moral values, that highly values education and hard work. Studies show that these children are likely to grow up in a safe neighborhood and obtain the kind of education that prepares them for success and go on to be an effective contributing member to society while enjoying economic success (regardless of skin color).

Nothing bad about being born to rich parents, but it is worth noting 60% of them exhaust their "family" money in their lifetime. And of those that manage not to do it, 70% of their children will exhaust their wealth. Something in their upbringing is lacking and even access to the best educations money can buy and growing up in a safe community does not compensate for it. Wealth has made them dependent (not on government, but on their parents' or grandparents' money) and once it runs out, they begin to spiral down the economic ladder.

At the other end of the spectrum, only around 16% of children that grow up in poverty permanently escape it as adults. A study of these children suggests that they absorb values not only from their parents but their community, that leads to them adapting the behaviors and values of people who are economically successful.

The study suggested, though I don't know if anyone has tested its theory, that if you relocate a poor family to live among middle class families and attend school with middle class children, that the chances of a poor child escaping poverty increase exponentially. This hints at the real meaning of privilege.

Now as noted, 10% of the wealthy don't fall victim to their family's wealth. And 16% of poor children do escape poverty permanently as adults. So being born poor or rich is more likely correlated with bad outcomes, not a cause of bad outcomes.

The challenge then is dig deeper in the causal factors and as hinted earlier, children "learn" from those around them... their families, their neighbors, their peers in school.

Most parents know how much influence their children's friends have on them and go out of their way to influence their "friend choices". I know we were overjoyed when my daughter opted into the IB program in high school. Surrounded by the highest achievers in school, the students fed off each other's desire to excel academically. My daughter is in her 3rd year of medical school today and most of her friends from high school have gone on to become very successful adults even those who came from modest backgrounds.

So, we know the family situation, economic situation, school situation and community situation that maximizes a child's chance of success as an adult. But how helpful is it if we as a society cannot emulate it for every child? Perhaps we can't and should admit it.

But admitting we can't help every child; does not mean we have to give up?

Last June, Beloved, a charter school in Jersey City graduated 100% of its senior class. What made it even more remarkable was 94% of the children were accepted into college and 75% of the children grew up in families living below the poverty line. I am prepared to bet, that far more than 16% of this group escapes poverty as adults.

So, we have a plan for children growing up poor coming from families committed to education to help them escape poverty... put them all together to feed off those shared values, create a safe environment for them to learn, and educate them.

But what about the children whose parents don't care. Who feel their life is good enough for their children? Don't they deserve a chance to realize their full potential? The answer to this last question is yes, the hard part is how?

I believe you can't force a child to learn (my parents tried), they learn when they are ready (lucky for me I was ready, halfway through college). But for some it may take longer. I think we need to build a "2nd Chance Program". At some point, many young adults realize they blew their chance for a good education or in some rare cases never had the chance and want it.

The 2nd Chance idea is that this group of young people would have access to free community college or vocational school that leads directly to good job in a field that needs talent. The Community College would include GED courses to get that requirement out of the way.

One of my black friends in high school was a textbook case. He grew up with a single mom in the poorest neighborhood in town. He never applied himself in school and we only became friends by virtue of being on the same football team (he even dropped out of sport before high school ended). You knew things would not end up well for him... and he ended up in prison for car theft.

While prison is not exactly the solution I have in mind, while in prison he learned to be an auto mechanic (went from stealing cars to fixing them). He married a woman of strong values and conviction. The combination of a strong woman and acquired skills turned his life around. Hard to emulate, but an insight into success... strong values and marketable skills.

And so, that hints to a solution for those adults that are not ready to be successful because of things often beyond their control as children, but something they desire as adults... a 2nd Chance educational track.

But what about the rich children that fail. Shouldn't we feel sorry for them? When I lived in a very affluent community in New England among wealthy families, it is amazing how they can't see how their behaviors are crippling their child's chance to be a productive citizen. When their child turns into a total dependent as an adult, they shake their heads and wonder what they did wrong... they gave their children everything... perhaps that is what they did wrong.

Now for my most radical thought... child labor.

Rich or poor and for different reasons, perhaps all children should work. Not so much that it interferes with their education, but enough for them to learn the values that one can learn working.

A study shows that if you can ensure working does not interfere with a child's education, the positive outcomes are amazing... children learn resilience, adaptability, work ethic, and they gain practical skills. They develop confidence and higher self-esteem, and they learn to manage the money they earn. For rich children, they get exposed to boundaries (employers won't put up with the nonsense that rich parents will).

Clearly, the challenge will be to find enough jobs and also to ensure the work does not interfere with the child's education. I know my father owned a business growing up. He put us to work doing the worst jobs at the company. We learned to work, appreciate the work of others, communicate with people, and appreciate what an education could offer.

What is the takeaway? If we want to create a more equitable society by narrowing the gap between the "opportunities" available to children growing up in different economic classes, we need to create better access to not only the education, but social values that produce success. The past is past and reliving it to understand how we got where we are... won't change anything, what will produce an enduring change going forward to understand the values and education that produce success and instill them into young children today.

The wonderful thing about our country and its political and economic system is that it already has the built in mechanisms for people of all races to succeed... nothing highlights that more than the black physician spouses of my nieces or the black wife of my son. All three are immigrants with the educations, work ethics, and values to succeed. Their success in America means other than skin color is holding people back... let's focus on that something else.